Tuesday, August 03, 2004


Well, Capitol Hill is well nigh in the clutches of gentrification. We spent Saturday night with friends from the Hill and eschewed our typical haunts to see what they've done with the hood. 8th street? My oh my. Ethnic food, weird new pavestones, and now the Shakespeare Theatre looks like the sketchiest entree on the block.

Watch out! The new neighborhood is safe for Republicans. Wearing a Kerry T-Shirt will bring you catcalls of derision. I know, I know...really, that's no different, in essence, from before. But, before, the catcaller would be that breed of humanzee colloquially known as the "staffer." The normal response to attitude from a Hill staffer was, and still is, a derisive snort and the exhortation to "Get a real job, Poindexter." That is usually sufficient for the "Staffer" to explode in a self-immolating burst of shame and self-hatred.

But the new Capitol Hill Republican once had a real job, and you should be careful in how you deal with them. They can and will buy and sell you--if you're lucky. The more cruel ones will spirit you way to their 6th Street SE panic rooms to be worked over by their manservant, Wenstley.

Luckily, I travel with the Wife of Deceiver. And no one fucks with her. She has a cruel streak a mile wide and she will--I repeat--will cut you.

In other weekend news, The Deceiver saw The Village and totally figured out the ending. Take that, M. Night Shamalamadingdong.

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

Can't STAND Capitol Hill. Too many white boys, suckin' Congressional dick for my tastes. Only so much gentrification can go on in that area, until they but up against some of DC's roughest ghettos.

Gonna love to seeing how that's all worked out.

Honestly, Capitol Hill is becoming the next Georgetown, and frankly, one Georgetown is one too many.

It won't be long before goofy guys walk around with their collars up or wearin' bow ties. Sigh...

I'm with yah.