Wednesday, October 20, 2004

Theme Song for the DC Music Scene Poseurs

It's as if Here's a Hint commissioned the Deceiver to write their theme song!

They didn't.

But anyway...

[sung to the tune of "Indie Rock and Roll" by The Killers]

Local rock'n'roll is what I want
In lieu of soul, it's what I need
Local rock'n'roll, it's time

Two of us
Flipping through an On Tap magazine
Jerk off on Arlington Music Scene
Bet your, your bottom dollar on me

It's local rock'n'roll for me
It's local rock'n'roll for me
It's all I heed
It's local rock'n'roll for me

At the show
Trying to get a gig with Exit Clov
Or bang the singer in Rotoscope
Making it, faking it, what do I care
Oh why should I care?

Just need a chance to sell out
Another set at the Grog, that'll freak you out
No sex, no drugs, no game, no clue
When I get on the stage

Stay if you wanna hear me play
Oh I might die if I don't make the scene
Like scenesters do to points obscene
Let's grow our egos to extremes

It's local rock'n'roll for me
It's local rock'n'roll DC
It's what I need
It's local rock'n'roll for me

1 comment:

Castor OiL said...

Yeah...those dicks. That's how I feel about dorks that were in the drama club.

To the tune of Stairway to Heaven

There's a lady I?m sure that won?t be so cold
When the drama club meets at seven
And when she gets there I know that my virginity will close
I?ve got nine dollars to woe her plus a roofie
Woe oh oh oh oh oh
And she'll be at drama club at seven

There's a sign on the wall but I want to be sure
That I got a part that has real meaning
Judd Frye is gone but the Cowboys who sing
Still look cool in their big boots and nose rings
Woe oh oh oh oh oh
And she'll be at drama club at seven

There's a feeling I get when I look at a breast
In the Macy?s flyer for this Spring
In my pants I have seen a hotdog poking through the seams
Someday me or my friends will touch the real thing
Woe oh oh oh oh oh
And we?ll talk about it at drama club at seven

And it's whispered that just because we play D&D
That the girls call us all losers
But a new day will dawn for us elves and Vikings
The girls will want to be our playthings

But it makes dad wonder
What is that bustle in my bedrooom
?We?re just practicing our lines ?
Pass the kleenex and the Maxim?they?re mine!

Sure we touch each other often
but that doesn?t mean we?re gay
We?re just practicing so we can get our sex on

My pants are tightening and it does show but she won't know
My loincloth makes my wiener look slim
Dear lady I can see your bra strap and did you know
My love for you almost hit my chin

And as we walk on down the road
Our Mountain Dew?s are barely even cold
There goes the lady we all know
Who told us fuck off geeks and go J.O.
And everything has gone so wrong
All our wieners are very hard
So we make a circle at last
When all are one and one is all
The drama club and a toilet tissue roll
Woe oh oh oh oh oh
And she told us to fuck off at seven

There's a lady who has real breasts and an ass
And she's banging the clerk from seven-eleven
And when we get home we know that pay-per-view is closed
Dad turned off Spice and parental controlled Seventh Heaven

So it?s the drama club with tissues and Maxim, uh uh uh.