People. Come to the DCist Happy Hour this Thursday from 6-9pm at The Big Hunt, and enjoy the company of their blogadocious editors and contributors and hallucinatory naked winged muses. Unless of course you are the serial arsonist. In which case, do not come. Because you burn people, and man, that is seriously not cool. Actually, serial arsonist, if you want to come for the purpose of turning yourself in to the DCist staff, that's okay, because that would be an awesome story for DCist to break. It'd be awesome to see Rob Goodspeed be all: "Suck it, Doreen Gentzler! You didn't get the story because you are a LOSER! And crimony, woman, what are you wearing?*"
DCist: We live to tell Doreen Gentzler to suck it.**
*I've never actually heard Rob Goodspeed use the word "crimony."
**These expressed views are most likely not the views held by DCist, and are really only part of the author's sick fantasia of one-upsmanship.