Wednesday, February 09, 2005

DCeptette: Coming at you from all diagonals version.

  1. Joseph Steffen, a longtime aide to Governor Poppa Slotz Ehrlich, has resigned amid admissions that he spread some tacky rumors about Ballmer Mayor Martin O'Malley on "popular conservative websites" and emails. Awwww! It's so cute the way they fight over who's going to be in charge of Maryland. It's like, "Hey, are you going to eat that last piece of carrion?" (Post)
  2. "Look. We have to stop talking about The Think! I'm tired of them getting all this free advertising! I mean, they are TOTALLY FUCKING AWESOME, yo. But enough is enough! No more talk about this incredible band!" Umm, pretty SNEAKY, sis. Had I been born retarded, I might have fallen for it too. (Craigslist)
  3. Howard Dean is poised to become DNC chair. Brilliant or foolhardy? We'll just have to see. I'm supposed to cry over donors who may leave the DNC? Umm, sure. Nice principles, assholes. Should I weep over the tone-deaf dimwits that ran the party into the ground? Pish! I'm only too glad Terry McAuliffe is heading to Goodbyesville, population him. He can take Bob Shrum with him. Losers. My only wish is that I could put my index and middle fingers in McAuliffe's nostrils and drag McAuliffe down K Street to Washington Circle, where I'd cleat his derriere repeatedly for the viewing pleasure of the GWU student body. Ahhh, a wish is a dream your heart makes! (DCist)
  4. Bigoted asshatters in the Virginia government continue their pile-on of stultifying asininity. Anyone want to participate in a reenactment of the burning of Richmond? These dishrag homophobes are gonna burn eventually, after all. (WTOP)
  5. "Any regular jams taking place at home?" So begins the most hilariously doofy Craigslist musician post EVER. Don't you want to invite this 40 year old noodlehead over to your house for a "regular jam"? Dude. He'll totally drive 100 miles out of his way for the chance! And while he just says no to drugs (making him a rebel in the drug-addled home-jam scene!), but he promises he "can and do[es] drink just a little bit." As he says: "Weeknights, weekends day or night, it don't matter." Sweet! Yeah! Let's totally have a regular jam! I'll bring my fuckin' autoharp! (Craigslist)

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