Holy shit, Cardozo? What the fuck is going on in your hallowed halls? And how much mercury has got to spill before they end up all unhallowed? Weeks after the mercury spill was said to have become a solved mystery, the culprits being a couple of pranksters caught on tape, Cardozo High has been the scene of a second and a third mercury spill.. What, as they say, is up, with that? The DCeiver offers five possibly implausible, or impossbly plausible, explanations.
- Cardozo's decision to pay for their senior prom by opening a Victorian Era haberdashery has hit an unexpected snag.
- The kids making the Science Fair volcanos have gotten the ingredients wrong.
- Cardozo High was actually built atop an ancient rectal thermometer burial grounds.
- The mercury spill is a message from the great god Pan that Cardozo must "make a choice" because he "won't wait forever." Again, "Make a choice" as it is apparently, "now or never."
- Fucking Donnie Darko did it.