Tuesday, July 05, 2005

DCeiversary! The Glorious First Year of DCeption.

It began... with a story--the story of a man shot in the stomach so severely, that it left him with the ability to pass anything through his alimentary canal. A story that the world needed to hear. A story that was probably remembered in the post-haze of a PBR dawn. Nevertheless, The DCeiver was born. And it became a lot more. A source of inspiration. A beacon of hope to the internet-weary. A place where the love for one of the world's greatest cities could raise its head without shame. A complement to the city's vibrant blogosphere. A warrior, mercilessly skewering of the dick- and dork- and assocracy of the few dicks, dorks, and asses that embarrass us. A proving-ground for the eternal triumph of hard-earned arrogance over ill-informed and pathetic pomposity. Yes, all of that and more.

The DCeiver celebrates its first DCeiversary today. It's a time to look back on the past year. A time to reflect. A time to remember. The DCeiver began with a modest goal--develop a blog that Marybeth Fritzky would enjoy. Mission accomplished.

As we begin our second year, it's important to not lose sight of our starting point, the destinations along the road, the wisdom we've gained from others and the contributions of our great works. So bookmark the shit out of this:

The Complete Year One Index of The DCeiver!

930 Forums:
Allawi, Ayad:
Altman, Andrew:
Arlington Music Scene messageboards:
arsonist, serial:
Band Camp:
Barry, Marion:
baseball team:
Basedow, John:
Bay, Michael:
"bend over, here it comes again":
Big Yawn:
black football coaches:
Blackman, Laura:
Blitzer, Wolf:

Bolton, John:
Boone, Pat:
Braff, Zach:
Brazil, Harold:
Brown Bunny, the:
Bush, Jenna:
Cannon, Ann:
Cannon, Vivian:
Capitol Hill:
Carlson, Tucker:
Carver, Katy:
Castor Oil:
Catania, David:
cat urine:
Ceton, Greg:
Cheesecake Factory:
Chomko, Elizabeth:
Christians, conservative:
City Year:
Cleveland Park Men's Club
Cochran, Emily:
Cox, Ana Marie:
Cropp, Linda:
Cutler, Jessica:
DC Bachelor:
DC sniper:
DC United:
Didactic Theatre Company:
Dinker, Carling:
diplomatic immunity:
Ehrlich, Governor:
Eidinger, Adam:
Evans, Jack:
Exit Clov:
Fenty, Adrian:
Fox news:
Gallo, Vincent:
Galloway, George:
Gannon, Jeff:
"Gas Man, the":
Gehry, Frank:
Going Out Gurus:
gunshot wounds:
Halperin, Mark:
Here's a Hint:
Herseth, Stephanie:
Hill Hotties:
Holden, Mike:
Homeland Security, Office of:
House Judiciary Committee:
information leafblower:
Jess, Sabrina Audrey:
Kamran, Paul:
K Street:
Landrieu, Mary:
Lauriol Plaza:
Lehrer, Jim:
Mackaye, Ian:
Malkin, Michelle:
Mangina Dentata:
Marks, Peter:
Maryland, University of:
mercury crisis:
Miller, Karl:
Nassri, Rahaleh:
Null, Ann V.:
Olmos, Edward James:
Owen, Hugh T.:
Pilate, Pontius:
Promise Keepers:
Pygmalion in a Blanket:
Rehnquist, William:
Rock and Romp:
Rwandan genocide:
Scarlet Letter:
Slatkin, Leonard:
smoking ban:
Snark Captain and the New Media of Tomorrow:
Splash Day:
So Others Might Eat:
Steinbuch, Robert:
Stewart, Jon:
Sullivan, Andrew:
Sullivan, Mark:
Tancredo, Tom:
things that are killing us:
Totushek, Courtney:
Trachtenberg, Steven Joel:
Tysons Corner:
Ullyot, John:
Virginia lawmakers:
Washington, DC:
Washington Examiner:
what the fuck:
Why I Hate DC:
Williams, Anthony:
wish, yeah you:
Wizards, Washington:
Yo La Tengo:


Blue Fish, Red Pond said...

Hey, I know Marybeth!
Congratulations on writing one of the most consistantly entertaining blogs in DC. Keep up the good work.

mb said...

HAHAHHA. i love your fucking blog. congratulations on a year, mothafucka.

Thomas said...

New York? Chicago? DCeiver would even be turned away at the Guthrie.

James said...

That was classic when you went Christian blogs and mocked the baby jesus. As an atheist it pains me to say this, but, jesus you are a goddamn liberal elitist asshole. You probably sit around wondering why average people in Ohio voted for Bush. Well, DCeiver, people all across this country, good people, middle of the road people, hate elitist assholes like you, and they saw a ton of you in John Kerry.

jg said...

jesus h. christ.
sounds like somebody woke up on the wrong side of the B-W parkway.

The Deceiver said...

PK, welcome to the world you've just unleashed on yourself. You're gonna get people who'll give you advice and support, and people like this guy, who'll scoff at the record you want to make and just keep coming back to remind you.

The difference is, at the end of the month, you'll have a record, proving them wrong. And I'll be back on stage, proving them wrong. It's not much of an accomplishment, but then again, the difference between you and me and these anonymous losers is that we've actually accomplished things.

jg said...

meanwhile, the index is impressive.
i'm particularly fond of "drowning in cat urine."

wasn't that about a trip to baltimore?

The Deceiver said...

JG, the last time I was in Baltimore, I was standing outside the aquarium with some friends, gawking at the tacky signage everywhere, and saying to myself: "My, my. Some of my friends may already be this fucked."

Then, yes, we were nearly drowned in cat urine. But that was the highlight of the trip.

Anonymous said...

Well, DCeiver, if you ever want to come back up to Baltimore, I would be glad to have a beer with you in a far better place than the tacky hell of the Inner Harbor.

The Deceiver said...

I readily admit--when you find yourself in the inner harbor, it's nobody's fault but yours.

Jake said...

Um, congrats on the DCeiversary. My condolences on the infestation.

The Deceiver said...

No worries, Jake. Every once in a while, people come looking to put shame in my game, they end up only wrecking themselves. Long live Calamity Jake.

catherine said...

holy crap! i echo jake's congratulations. i poo all over anon's comments. truly the most bitter, weirdest bunch of text i have seen in my many days on the internets.

tom said...

happy blogiversary.

also: jesus. the things people reveal about human nature when they get a taste of anonymity are profoundly depressing.

The Deceiver said...

Yeah, online anonymity emboldens the snivelers. It didn't take me a whole year to figure that out, obvs.

A good distraction, though.

Washington Cube said...

Well, DCeiver. What a nice anniversary you are having. I just made it through the comments mine field.

...Anyway. Congratulations on your first year.

catherine said...

dceiver is nowhere near anonymous. he links to reviews of shows he's been in. his name and photo are on DCist. several bloggers and blog readers in the d.c. area (myself included) have hung out with him many times. what do you want him to do, come aknockin on your front door? he's about as un-anonymous as an online writer can get.

tom said...

Using an alias isn't the same as being anonymous. As your comments accrete and an online personality develops around your name -- even if it isn't your real name -- you end up being shunned or praised for the sum of your actions. That's the difference. One-offs in a comment thread are an entirely different animal.

The Deceiver said...

Items on index that are objects of derision: 59 (and, mind you, this includes things like the Rwandan genocide and the serial arsonist)

Items on index that are praised and flattered: 41

Tipping it waaaay toward praise: any entry entitled "Calling All Enthusiasts", in which I routinely praise people bringing good stuff to see and do in DC. I declined to add the contents of those posts to the index after it was made painfully clear that doing so would make it go on forever. Here is a short list of those singled out for praise by the DCeiver that didn't make the index:

Juniper Lane
Mary Prankster
John Waters
Ami Dayan
Afrika Bambaata
the Redskins
Full Minute of Mercury
Karmella's Game
Jay Parini
William Saroyan
The American Century Theatre
The Arlington Cinema and Drafthouse
Dogs Die In Hot Cars
The AFI Theatre in Silver Spring
The Trachtenburg Famile Slideshow Players
Tony Kushner
Capital Weather, esp. Jason Samenow
The Kings of Leon
The National Gallery of Art
Malcolm Gladwell
Katie Melua
The Wrens
Holly Tegeler
the Journeymen Theatre Ensemble
the Washington Social Club
Politics and Prose Bookstore

...and I could go on and on, and on and on.

But like I said, empirical fact is on my side, at the ready, and easily proven. To say otherwise, you'd have to just be blind with delusion.



The Deceiver said...

By the way, did it feel good eliminating anonymous' eliminations, knowing that he spent, like, HOURS working on them?

Yeah. It kinda did.

A. L. Deviant said...

Damn DCeiver! You look GOOD for one! Sexiness DOES cure all woes.