Wednesday, November 09, 2005

Hey Candidate Rees! You just got served.

Jonathan Rees talks a good game--provided that game is Milton Bradley's Crazy Ass. He's aware of a PAC that's forming because Sam Brooks "jumped the fence"--and we all know that DC doesn't cotton to motherfuckers who leap over fences (I guess). He's connected, too. After all, he scored tickets to the mayoral debate--we'll hear tomorrow about how he was the center of attention, natch. And he claims to always "sign" everything he posts online--with his magical unicorn pen!

But does Jonathan Rees have the balls?

Not buying it, Rees. You're awful cocky when you're driving Craig Newmark crazy. But I don't think you've got the stones, buddy.

So let's find out, Johnny. The DCeiver is calling you out. In the hopes that we can suss out your testicular fortitudes--along with serving to elevate the Ward 3 race to the level of "juvenile"--The DCeiver is challenging you to a water balloon fight. Bring your staff, too, Rees. I'll take on all comers. Let's see if you've got the sack to run Ward 3. Let's see if you, like so many great American leaders, learn something about yourself while cradling a balloon based water-drenching implement in the palm of your hands.

Come on, Rees. Let's do this. Unless you're a big fat pussy. You're not a big fat pussy, are you?


Anonymous said...

Let me guess, Rees will show up with Ramon, Alex, Gloria, Stewart, and his legions of followers!

Good luck Mr. Rees. Be prepared for a drenching!

Anonymous said...

Here's a list of some of the identities that Rees has been using:

Alex Biddy
Angela Biddy
Harry Firestone
Nicole Sherry Dixon
Kathleen Roddy
Suzanne Jackson
Melinda Sussman
Mindy Silverman
Lester Graham
Gabriella Rees
Anita Rees
Roy Stewart
Gloria Guiterrez
Ramon Rivera (Gloria Guiterrez and Ramon Rivera share the same email address,

Anonymous said...

Annoyed, not crazed.


Anonymous said...

This will all end eventually, when Jonathan Rees' DC Court record is posted. For a hint of what's there:

Butterstick said...

Dude, I'm less than a year old. I've just barely gotten the hang of this whole walking around thing. And I'm a freakin' panda. And even I know that it's not nice to pick on the retarded and mentally ill in our society. Naughty, naughty.

The Deceiver said...

I heart Craig Newmark! Thanks for stopping by!

Anonymous said...

Rees is now pretending to be somebody from Fenty's staff: I can't imagine that Adrian Fenty is going to let Jonathan Rees get away with pretending to be Fenty's campaign manager.

(Here's a Tinyurl in case the link above doesn't work:

Here's the full post from Craig's list:

Reply to:
Date: 2005-11-07, 10:26PM EST


Hello, my name is Alex Evans and I m the campaign manager for Fenty for Mayor and we fired Sam Brooks for reasons I am not allowed to disclose.

Sam knows this to be true.

So that Sam knows this is me, he knows last Friday he and I went to the Office of Campaign Finance. Only Sam would know that.

DCepticon said...

Just so you know it is me that camera I installed in your shower, the lens seems to fog when the water is running. By the way love the new curtains in the living room. I wouldn't have picked you as a flower kind of guy but there I go again thinking that spending every waking moment of my day following you everywhere would give me some insight into your interior design choices. Why won't you return my calls?


Anonymous said...

On DCist, Jonathan Rees wrote, "Nope, it is not a crime to inpersonate another." (Posted by: Jonathan Rees at November 10, 2005 09:25 AM).

Could this be the beginning of legal trouble for Rees?

Anonymous said...

Isn't it time for some Jonathan Rees jokes? I'll start:

How many Jonathan Reeses does it take to change a light bulb?

None: He can't tell that the bulb's never worked at all.

Anonymous said...

Q: What's the difference between Jonathan Rees and a delusional mean-spirited ranting spammer?


(ba-dump ump)

Anonymous said...

Jonathan Rees now has his own Yahoo Group at

Please visit it.

Brooks2006 said...

Thanks for your attention to this, and for everyone's vigilance.

Seth Lavin, Sam Brooks for Ward 3

Anonymous said...

It gets better all of the time. Someone has posted a variety of links to Rees (and his alter egos) posts at Yahoo, complete with IP address information.

It's worth the read: