Friday, June 23, 2006

The following took place between 10:00 am and 12:00 pm.

Some news on today's 24 Symposium at the Heritage Foundation, which, by dint of Joel Surnow's presence, should properly be called a "pimposium."

  • It was a total sausage factory. Check the pic. Still plenty for Clarence Thomas to jerk off about later.
  • Mary Lynn Rajskub didn't wear a bra.
  • When Michael Chertoff, speaking on the differences between the intelligence gathering techniques shown on 24 as compared to the ones the Department of Homeland Security uses, said: "We don't get information using measures that violate the law," everyone in the room finished their beers in accordance with the rules of the Mike Chertoff is Lying Out Of His Ass Drinking Game.
  • No one gave Limbaugh any percocets, so he was sort of a dick. DefenseTech reports that his questions were "leading" and "tendentious."
  • Explaining why he thought people liked the show, Heritage's David Heyman said: "it allows the viewers to have both "justice" (nabbing the bad guys) and "process" (action within a legally-accepted system) - when in the real world it's often difficult to have both." So, what you're saying, David, is that people are drawn to these entertainments because they depict stories that are not like the real world? THAT'S SO GROUNDBREAKING THAT I FORGOT TO BE IN AWE OF YOUR MIGHT BRAIN!!
  • Oh, and Mike Chertoff was DEFINITELY shirty. Leaving early for a press conference on the Miami terror arrests, he snippily took a jab at officials from Washington and New York City, who got screwed in the security funding cycle, by saying that this "proved...terrorism was a 'national problem.'" Oh, yeah. Because Mayors Williams and Bloomberg were TOTALLY insisting that it wasn't a national problem. Yes, Mikey, I specifically remember Williams and Bloomberg saying that no one else but them in the whole country had to worry about terrorism. It was totally the people from Washington and New York City being disingenuous--not the motherfuckers who wrote on official governmenty paper that New York had no appreciable landmarks. OH NO.

I guess there's one foreign enemy that's running loose over at Chertoff's office:

"RRRAAWWWWRRR! That's right Chertoff...tell us more about your fucking WORLDVIEW, dipshit!"


Gibson said...

I am scarred permanently by that pic in the Post of Rush smooching my beloved Chloe. I hope she threw up a little into his mouth.

Andy said...

I found the same article and I hurried over here to say the same. Although tell me it wouldn't have been hysterical if Chloe tazered him right there.