Friday, June 23, 2006

Joel Surnow to Bring his Magnificent Bastardry to Heritage Foundation

If only we hadn't squandered all of our corporate goodwill w/r/t looking the other way when we're supposed to be working on sneaking off to Mackey's to watch the World Cup! Because if we thought we could get away with it, we would totes have been in attendance at the Heritage Foundation's symposium on 24, entitled "24 and America's Image in Fighting Terrorism: Fact, Fiction, or Does It Matter?" I don't know if international terrorists have any feelings on 24, but if they hate us for the crapulence that the West Wing devolved into, score one for the They've Got A Point column.

Joel Surnow, whose deft tiptoeings between pleasing both the pro- and anti-Bush cult in rapid, tensely plotted succession were on full display last season, is there in the flesh, along with the man who's made the strongest case yet for placing the Secretary of the Department of Homeland Security alongside the biker and the Indian in some 21st Century version of the Village People--Michael Chertoff. He doesn't get shirty--he gets Cherty!

Gregory Itzin, who played the diabolical wussbag President Logan is there, as well as Carlos "Tony Almeida" Bernard. But you know why we're really sorry to be missing this, don't you? Also guesting on the panel is The Genius that is Mary Lynn Rajskub! So hot it burns!

We imagine that the following topics will be covered:

  • Epic Bauerian Angst: Is it covered by the DHS Health Plan?
  • What is America Doing About The Cougars?
  • We Don't Actually Have Those Red-Shirt Guys Guarding Secure Areas, Do We? Because Seriously, Y'all...Those Guys Blow.
  • Edgar Styles: Another Victim of Liberal Appeasement?
  • Can I Borrow Some of the Hottie Extras You Are Done Banging, Joel? Thanks Dude.
And, topping it all off, the panel discussion is being moderated by Rush Limbaugh, who'll probably be dyspeptic as hell at having a word derived from "moderate" attached to his good name.

Here's hoping Rush's dealer equipped him with something to help him take the edge off. And here's hoping that Mary Lynn answered all questions like Chloe would: "Guh! Whatever!"

If any of you went, PUH-LEASE let me know how it was. Thanks to Ben and the Wonkettes for the info.


Red Line said...

A former co-worker does fundraising at Heritage. A shame I'm not in DC at present, this would've been great to attend.

tones said...