Monday, March 05, 2007

I am typing "WTF!" just as HARD as I can.

So, I just read on Yahoo that the Dallas Cowboys signed a dude named Leonard Davis to the largest contract in the history of the franchise. And Leonard Davis is an offensive lineman for the ARIZONA FUCKING CARDINALS. If there's been one truism since the day Neil Lomax walked off the gridiron for the last time, it is this: the Arizona Cardinals always, UNFAILINGLY, employ AWFUL offensive linemen. I will not even argue this with you.

So this guy, for the money that could have been spent to mine Troy Aikman's stem cells to create a race of Super (But Slightly Concussable) Uberquarterbacks, is going to play for Dallas. This does not bode well. For Dallas fans anyway. I think it's great. If Dick Cheney, Satan, David Caruso and my high school guidance counselor former a football team, I would root for them if they played Dallas.

Anyway, in other news, Dallas re-signed kicker Martin Gramatica, center Andre Gurode, and a fucking dragon from the flop movie Eragon to help set the rest of Jerry Jones' money on fire.

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