Friday, July 06, 2007

DCeptette: Def Leppard Tribute!

  1. “Why? Why? Why? Why? Why?” he said. “Rosanna Arquette doesn’t look like a thing like Madonna. And you’d have to be a moron to desperately seek either one.” Those words: still true today.
  2. In what will likely be a yearly tradition, the Fourth of July aftermath has led to complaints about the "DIY" fireworks displays that go on all over the city. Some say: that's urban life. Others say: people deserve some peace. There's some middle ground to be had, of course: no one should go to bed tonight expecting the city to be some quiet, bucolic place, and, as far as the Fourth is concerned, it really doesn't matter if you live in a city or a field--wherever there are available fireworks, there will be somebody who stays up until 3am shooting them off. Still, there are limits: people shouldn't have to be fearful of dipshits firing fireworks at people's homes or persons. You'd think that would be an easy line to draw, but when you peep the DCist commentariat, you'll see that there are all sorts of those "be rich act poor" fauxhemian types who scorn and mock anyone who dares suggest that their property or livelihood or person should be protected from pyrotechnics. Twatwaffles, all, I say, who would be well served to clamp their noiseholes. People who do that shit with fireworks are no participating in some vital facet of urban life, they're participating in a dull facet of criminality. Anyway, I'd lay you odds that if I pointed a roman candle at any of these shitheels used Vespas or Pumas or vintage bike-messenger bags, they'd raise a holy screaming-meemie shitfit the likes of which you've never seen. And, underscoring the point is this story in SFist, in which a drummer in a local band got her hand maimed when some fuckwad threw an M80 at her. Her career as a musician is basically over now, and seeing as she'll only have on functional hand from now on, most of her attempts at having any sort of career will be complicated. Just goes to show: no matter how punk as fuck you are, illegal fireworks will FUCK you up. So, STFU, urbanite phonies.
  3. Of course, aiming things at video cameras is still okay. Especially if you are Wayne Rooney. [via Deadspin]
  4. Ha, ha. Blowjob joke.
  5. Could someone ring up the good people at the Associated Press and let them know that it's been a solid month since anyone evinced an interest in the Deborah Jean Palfrey story? K, thx. [Washington Post]

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