Tuesday, March 04, 2008

Summary Judgement: February 2008

A lot of stuff was written on this blog in February. Leap Day, after all! Anyway, in case you missed it, here is the executive summary of the last month in the life.
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Obama's downplaying his chances there, too. That said, the advantage is to Clinton, if only because Obama has to come off message.

AMANDA: I used to watch Nip/Tuck. I watched this season's premiere. Wow. No one reads.

Some reality teevee outfit has proposed some sort of LAGUNA BEACH-esque tone poem to the vacuous, STD-ridden, attention whores who populate Late Nite Shots. Oh, teevee, if you love me at all, you bring me the sight of these nozzles.

Also, they have no vote in DC, so it's about time a DC mayor stopped cottoning to interests that have no electoral impact and only make DC residents irked.

Super Tuesday's Big Winner, Canada Division: Feist!

Missouri is full of late voters that love Claire McCaskill like their mother. West Virginia caucuses hard with redoes, deals and Huckabee.

We're totes impressed with this DC themed coffee table. It offers many distinct advantages over the regular coffee table. If you're Ryan, for example, a stack of Richard Florida books, becomes a "light-rail adjacent infill development" of Richard Florida books. The high cost of quality jigsawry! This table runs you upwards of $600.

OMG! Was Dennis from 30 Rock right about everything? Holy shit.

Allow me to pick up a discussion I've read about in a couple places. The "bookstore experience." All record stores, like all book stores, sell essentially the same product. First: Bookstores have a much easier time at building an experience through in-store promotions. Having worked this beat for DCist, I can tell you, it's standard trade at all levels of book retail - from corporate chains to indies. Now, record stores often do the same thing - instore performances - but they're harder. Also: having worked at a large chain music store, I can tell you first hand that corporate types are skittish on in-stores because of shrinkage. Second: I'm not sure the process of buying books online has made as radically pleasant as it is buying records. Somehow, though, I enjoy the way a book store will present the merchandise. I always inspect the new releases table - especially when there's reissues/reprints alongside new releases. If you pick up any good city guide, you'll be directed to a goodly number of bookstores that are considered worth visiting. I imagine people who come to DC make the trip to P&P for the same reason people flock to The Strand in NYC or City Lights in San Francisco. If I'm making a long stay in a different city, bookstores are something I like to seek out. (Never been to The Strand, though - but Housing Works is pretty fantastic.) Do people, travelling and touristing get as excited about record stores? At the same time, it sort of proves that this stuff isn't rocket science.

So I guess I didn't realize that Barack Obama went to Punahou School in Hawaii. I hate for my experiences with people to be so limited.

Prior to the game, I told him that he owed it to himself to study Ryan Pettinella's free-throw shot. My brother said that Pettinella's terrible free throw shooting was on display again today. Pettinella, my brother said, literally hid. Oh, well.

Hi. So yeah. Everyone is goddamned idiot. President Bush made a big deal about how he submitted a budget to Congress "electronically."

Good Jesus. JIM ZORN! I officially envy the dead! SERIOUSLY. LET'S GIVE IT UP FOR DEAD PEOPLE!

Dude. Great! Except fuck that, ABC! We've waited on that since the first episode! Like: I didn't even bat a goddamned eye when Uncle Junior's roommate turned on that funky-ass dustbuster and started talking to ghosts and shit. Fuck! Seriously.

Dig Sir Charles announcement on CNN. Also: Wolf Blitzer=idiot. Barkley: In 2014, I promise you...I will run for governor of Alabama. Blitzer: When will you run for governor of Alabama? Barkley: 2014. Can Barkley bring people together? Work past racial barriers? Racial code words? Eliminationist rhetoric? It was the consensus of those of us who watched the commercial that "flaky white stuff" exclusively referred to Danny Ainge.

There's not much to recommend the City Paper's recent cover story, "One Mission, Two Newsrooms." Print versus web, eh? Egggghhh. I've been reading Poynter for about five years now, so, uhm...yeah. If only there were cellular phone devices or a rich tradition of separate, international bureaus or something!! Not even a little bit.

Mandys t r e t c h: ok, so, last night i received the worst (best?) pick up line of all time, “Cause you've been staring at my package all night."

DCeiver: omg

DCeiver: I don't suppose you had been...

Mandys t r e t c h: hahahaha. DCeiver: HA!

You got lawyers, Mensa members, people with musical talent, people with a social conscience...and that's all great.

Granted, that time's gonna be a long way off, but it's never too soon to start taking score.

Amanda's objets de sac a main have a rich history of adventure and mystery. If memory serves me correctly, the good people at the Black Cat sent her home with Sommer Mathis' credit card once, whilst sending hers home with Sommer. This is pretty good luck.

Woo-haah, assholes! [Incidentally, the source origin of "I drink your milkshake" is pretty tricky!]

We had previously commented on the City Paper's Erik Wemple making the fascinating discovery that tensions between print and web DO EXIST! In Wemple's character-imaginings, the typical Post reporter speaks with the dialect of a coked-up Ray Romano trapped in the world's worst David Mamet play. You drive like a fucking tourist! Huh. Nice perk! WTF? OH NOES! He's gonna be late getting home to Stephanie Mencimer! Better call ahead and mitigate all the poop-flinging!

Seriously? Funny--most of the people I work with are in New York, and we have these things called "phones" and "computers" that help us facilitate our mundane-ass discussions. OMG! Total driving time=15 minutes!

We're making fun of videos of people driving today, like we do every February 19th! WAKE UP, MORON. "The Funeral" is an awesome song, though--it totally deserves a better commercial.

DCeiver: A fair point.

Now, back on four, four, tight on Obama. HOW YOU LIKE THAT SHIT!" Anyway, if anyone ended up with any decent downblouse shots of Campbell Brown, you know how to email me.

"So fucking what?” "Word."

Related: Also, everyone thought this was pretty great.

Thank you, Paul. Middle-class prude maven Laura Sessions Stepp and himbo jugger-not David Zinczenko. Stepp gets to ask crazy sweeping questions like, "Men are historically uninterested in health issues. Why?" Soon, Zinczenko is talking up the life-saving advantages of vanity, which is hilarious because if we were talking about women getting their vanity on, Stepp would be decrying it. Nice to know that Zinczenko has learned the hard lessons from the Iraq War. In the next issue of Men's Health, learn how to trim your nose hairs while burning abdominal fat at the same time!

Three teeth-rattling explosions that knocked our power out. Naturally we called 9-11, along with about 30 other people. The power company said that they'd send someone round to see if the problem could be identified. Anyway, shit was bananas for a long time, but they did manage to restore power (obvs, or I wouldn't be blogging), which on a Sunday afternoon, getting it back by nightfall to such a wide area pretty much counts as great work in my book.

First, Marion Cotillard won for La Vie En Rose, which I endorse to the fullest possible degree. And Cotillard was adorable tonight. I correctly guessed Best Picture, Best Director, Best Actor and Actress, Best Supporting Actor, Best Foreign Language Film (The Counterfeiters seemed the most Holocausty), Art Direction, Makeup, Score, Song, Animated and Live Action Short, Sound Editing and Mixing, and Diablo Cody. I wanted Amy Ryan to win because I am a Beadie Russell fan, but I wasn't surprised that Tilda Swinton won instead. She will go home tonight and fuck both of the men she's currently living with/fucking. Oh, and, as expected, Heath Ledger won the Final Applause During the Death Montage, and Norbit won the Academy Award for Racism.

Silver medal.

Learn it. Call at 4:30am. I don't care if it's just stuff like from that Christopher Walken "Dead Zone" sketch on Saturday Night Live ("You're gonna be eating...some ice cream.”) - make the call.

Obviously, Gary Busey is straight nutlog. Watch your back, Leah Remini.

It's nice to know that DC's Theatre nominations process did not come down to superdelegates.

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