Sunday, April 06, 2008

The Audacity Of Dopes: Mark Penn Is Gone

Mark Penn wrote some book on "microtrends," then joined the Clinton campaign because apparently they think he's a genius. Then Mark Penn said that Obama's dumb message of hope and change only resonated with impressionable elites, and he should know, because he sold his book full of dumb messages to them as well. No one noticed that Penn was dumb or his ideas were dumb or that Bill Clinton himself won the presidency on a message of hope and change or that Penn was slowly turning Hillary Clinton into a cyborg made of copper wires, tears, and fraud. Later, however, the other people in the Clinton camp started to realize how much they hated Penn, so they started talking shit about him and they hired unpleasant Sarcasto-Ghoul Harold Ickes to be his personal tormentor. Finally Penn realized that he loved the nation of Colombia more than his job as advisor to the president, so he told the nation of Colombia some stuff that was at odds with the stuff he was telling Clinton. But then everyone started yelling at him and everyone decided to fire him. So now Penn has no friends and a giant hole in the front yard of his Georgetown home that he can fill with pretend money.

Meanwhile, all of Clinton's other advisors would soldier on in her doomed campaign, getting paid huge sums of money until weeks later when they all fired each other for incompetence.

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